“It is necessary, and even vital, to set standards for your life and the people you allow in it.”
~ Mandy Hale
Any time your life changes, there is always a feeling of loss.
After all, what you had before, is no longer there. But do you really miss your ex or is it the idea of having someone in your life what you miss?
If your ex was so great, you’d still be seeing him.
If the relationship was healthy and happy, you’d be enjoying your time together. So, it seems you are really missing having a boyfriend.
You have a choice. You can either dwell on what’s missing or you can look to the future. You can either focus on all you’ve had or you can imagine all that you can have. Actually, realize you have gained so much by this “loss” and that is a good thing!
Look over the list below and apply whichever ones fit your particular situation.
Tell yourself, “Because of this loss, I have gained…”
- Renewed confidence, self-respect, dignity
- A new sense of freedom, acceptance and excitement
- Broader horizons, no restrictions, no limitations
- Awesome wonder, optimism, hope
- Courage, empowerment and fortitude
- New friends, goals, motivation
- Pride, appreciation and gratefulness
- Valuable insights, self-awareness, greater personal knowledge
When you look at things this way, it becomes easier to let go of the past and embrace the future with a new enthusiasm.
Be brave enough to leave behind what seems familiar and comforting and venture into unexplored territories.
Just find one positive thing that inspires you from your experience and you’ll notice tons of other things will be close behind.
Pretty soon you won’t remember how things were before, because you’re living your new life and growing accustomed to the new you.
Amy Sherman, M.A., LMHC – www.yourbabyboomersnetwork.com
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