“Communication must be HOT – Honest, Open and Two-Way.”
~ Dan Oswald
Communication is not as easy as it seems.
In fact, most relationship problems stem from a “lack of communication” between the partners.
One person misinterprets what the other said and before you know it, the relationship unravels into an ocean of resentment, anger, mistrust and even revenge.
This can all happen when both parties are communicating face to face or even over the phone.
Imagine the problems you can have if your communication is mainly through texting!
- Why didn’t he answer my text?
- What did he mean by that statement?
- Does he care that he hasn’t spoken to me in a few hours?
- What’s he doing now?
These are the kinds of things that can go through your mind when communicating only through text, when there is no clear or concise understanding of how your partner is really feeling, since you don’t see him or hear him.
So, if he stops texting,
- What is he really saying?
- Is he ghosting you, hinting that the relationship is over?
- Is he innocently too busy and didn’t have the time to text?
- If you are calm and level-headed and your partner is anxious and high-strung, how would you each know?
- Would humor work or would it be interpreted as sarcasm?
If you want to find out what’s going on – call.
Have a conversation on the phone and discuss what you’re feeling to find out what he’s feeling and then you’ll know.
The only time you should text is to check in, to confirm meeting times, to be sure everyone is ok.
But for serious conversations that need explanations, clarity, connection and support, it is best to speak face to face or at least over the phone.
So, should you text him? Only if you want to prolong your confusion.
If you are looking for relationship fulfillment, text minimally and talk maximally to create the “real thing!”
Amy Sherman, M.A., LMHC – www.yourbabyboomersnetwork.com
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